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I have been fortunate to have lived in Kuwait, Egypt and Morocco for nearly twenty years altogether. I have also been to many other Arab countries – Libya, Tunisia, Algeria, Lebanon, Syria, Bahrain, Jordan, Yemen - for shorter periods of time. I have visited several other countries very briefly. Some of the time, I was a soldier; some of the time a working teacher of English; some of the time retired. I have been indeed fortunate to know and become a friend to a wide range of Arabs from High Court judges to shoeshine boys, farmers to doctors, old and young, men and women, from towns, villages and countryside.

The pages which follow are an attempt to draw together my impressions of these years. Initially I set out on this exercise entirely for my own satisfaction – to try to capture the impact upon myself of the different way of life. During the numerous drafts and redrafts, I consulted widely with my friends, both Arab and Western. It then began to dawn on me that my notes might be of wider interest. Many Arab friends seemed fascinated to read about themselves and to have a chance to look at themselves in the mirror, as it were. They were sad that my comments often seem to reflect badly on their country but agreed that most of my conclusions were accurate. My Western friends living in the Arab World measured their differing reactions and experiences against my own and several lively discussions ensued. Family and friends from the West who did not know the Arab World very well read my comments from their different perspective and perhaps gained some useful insights into a culture which they had previously regarded as alien and unsympathetic. Many such Westerners tended to forget that the way of life had often been very similar in the West itself until quite recently (female emancipation in Britain, for example) and it perhaps forced them to be a little more self-critical too.

I have tried to cover some of the major differences between our two styles of living – the Western and the Arab. I debated long and hard as to whether to start with those elements which I personally would broadly label as ‘negative’ or with those which I personally find ‘positive’ and ‘warming’, the ones which have made living in the Arab world so deeply rewarding, at least for me. Finally, I decided to be brave and start with the ‘negative’ comments. I do realise that much of what I say might appear critical, subjective and based only on a narrow range of experiences. However, I hope my readers will go the full distance and thus be able to balance the earlier ‘negative’ comments against the positive range of points I make towards the end.

It is, of course, somewhat absurd to attempt to lump together the three main groups of Arab states – Magreb/North Africa, the “Fertile Crescent” and the Arabian Gulf – into one broad generalisation. To ameliorate this shortcoming, I have tried to give personal examples from all three areas to illustrate both some of the differing emphases and some of the similarities. It is also necessary to stress that ‘Arab’ and ‘Muslim’ are not synonymous. The vast majority of citizens in the Arab States are indeed Muslims. However, there are many minorities from several different sects within the main religions – for Muslims the Sunni, Shia, Malaki, Ismaili, Druze (or more accurately, Al Mowahedeen),etc, and for Christians the Coptic, Catholic, Armenian, Maronite, etc - living in peace within majority Muslim communities. There are also indeed still many small Jewish enclaves existing peacefully within the Arab world. However, the strongest influence by far on the patterns of behaviour within the Arab World is that of Islam, which overlies the older Persian and newer Ottoman influences.

Living within the Arab World as I do, I have tried to steer away from contentious comments on internal Arab political topics for obvious personal reasons. However, readers will not have to be too discerning to observe that I feel in no way a need to restrain my criticism of the behaviour of the elected leaders of some of the Western ‘democratic’ powers. Recent events clearly indicate a fierce determination by certain leading western state regimes to re-mould the Arab World in their own image. My belief is that the Arab World must indeed change and adapt to a post industrial revolution world but it must do so in its own way and its own time and within its own cultural and religious parameters. Blame is not entirely one-sided.

It is consequently fair to say that many of the traits I describe below are indeed in a process of changing. The Arab World is presently groping for this ‘modus vivendi’ of its own as it meets the full force of the efforts by the West to suborn it by bringing the Arab sense of behaviour, fashion and way of thinking more into line with those of the English-language-dominated mass media. It may be that a greater awareness of the contrasts between the Arab and Western way of life I try to outline below could help this process.

Finally, this article contains only my personal observations about habits and possible causes of them. It is certainly not in any way intended to convert one culture to another. It would indeed be a tragedy if the Arab qualities of careful reflection, kindness, courtesy, hospitality, moderation and tolerance were lost in a frenetic fast food, mass media, multi-national maelstrom. Let us strive to keep ‘la richesse de la difference’. There is too much uniformity and standardisation in the modern world already.

On a point of style, I have followed the traditional convention of writing “he” rather than “he or she” or the more clumsy “(s)he” in those instances where I could be referring to either a male or female person. I crave the forgiveness of my lady readers.

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