Sample

Word gets around

This was none of Bode's idea; he blamed Ashley for that. To go have dinner in a dark restaurant named 'See?' on the outskirts of San Francisco was too peculiar a prospect for him. What if he found a piece of hair or a fly on his plate? He wanted to see what he was eating, how it was dressed. How could he know what was on his plate? But as he had planned to propose to Ashley that very night, he would not waver, it was not like him. Without his observing the expression on her face, her eyes sparkle or not, the occasion would not be the same, he thought. He felt their relationship wanted authenticity, he wished he had a tighter grip on it, and not only because of the denials on her side.
    The date was fixed for 6.45 p.m. sharp. Bode's punctuality did not tolerate the least departure. He wore a beige tuxedo and a black thistle for originality. Spiffy. He had clammy hands and kept rubbing them on the sides of his trousers. He did not know why but he wished Ashley would not show up. A presentiment he hoped was wrong.
     At 6.46, Bode considered Ashley was late. Ashley left work later today and her car broke down. She too, had something to tell Bode... She was pregnant! She preferred to disclose the news in the darkness, in the immediate contact of their presence. She did not mind not observing Bode's expression. She would have other chances, she thought. Part of her was excited at the prospect, the other was dreading it!
     She deemed their relationship was 'too real', all the more with the highly expected baby. One day she felt the coming event drew them closer together, the next she felt them drifting apart… another she felt it did not change a single thing.
     In the subway she had not singled out the merry couple making eyes at one another, only next to them the young fellow with deep blue eyes in a brown leather jacket and a peacock blue shirt with two buttons loose at the collar and a shivering glitter of sympathy, a voluptuous fullness edged slightly with feverish melancholy in his look.
     She had bid Bode to enter the restaurant in case she was delayed. Bode reluctantly decided to go in at 6.50 p.m. He blamed her for this as well.
     The restaurant resembled a spacious, whitish log cabin on the side of a road lined with large oaks, which cast a calming shade. He lit his last cigarette to stall for time. It started to drizzle, and in a moment the rain started pelting. Bode cupped his hand over his cigarette to screen it from the drops. Then he hurried in and gave his name to the lady at the cloak rack and smiled back at her mechanically. She blindfolded him with a soft velvet band and took him by the hand to Bode and Ashley's table. Bode felt a pang in his heart when the lady let go of his hand into the night. He heard a chair scrape the floor and the warm hand guide him to sit down to table.
     "Will you order now or would you rather wait until your company has arrived?" The lady said in a dulcet, mysterious voice. "Or will you have an appetizer while you're waiting?"
     Bode tried to listen to where the words came from and turned to them.
     "I'll just wait, thank you." Bode said to the dark, thinking 'What the devil am I doing here?'
     "I shall come back then." The voice said.
     Bode listened to the voices about him, for the sound of steps. He coiled up in himself and squirmed in his chair. He felt for the objects on the table, he placed them until his memory let him know the position of objects before he touched them. Then he tried to remember the route out in his mind. The manic peals of laughter coming from some table to his left nettled him. Resentment was building up in him for Ashley's tardiness.
     "Hi, sweetheart" said the beloved voice through the darkness.
     "Hello honey" Bode answered in a relieved tone, thinking 'Where have you been? I have been waiting for you.'
     He heard the chair opposite him scrape the floor and he smelt Ashley's perfume. Once seated she leant over the table and caressed Bode's face; she planted a kiss on his forehead.
     "Will you have a glass of wine for a starter?" Bode suggested.
     "I don't drink, remember?" Ashley said cheerfully.
     They waited for the lady to come back and read the menu for them. They placed their order and Bode indulged himself with a glass of wine.
     "I have something to say to you Bode" Ashley started. Everything was going so fast through her mind she heard herself say in a non-committal tone "I was unfaithful to you once."
     Bode paled in the dark. "Well, I am glad that you should uncover it now because so was I" flew from his lips, just to uphold his pride.
     "Aren't we a couple, Bode? Don't you think nothing should remain unsaid between us?"
     "Sure," Bode said, thinking 'But still do you have to taunt me with your sex life?' Bode winced and scowled. "I have a question for you though" Bode resumed. "Are you saying this for the sake of truth, for me (doubtful), or for yourself? To come clean?" Bode felt a surge of spite flush into his face.
     "I am telling you the truth," Ashley said as if it were necessary. "You know I have a mean streak in me, darling." Ashley said sardonically. "I swallowed two pages from the Holy Bible when I was twelve" thinking 'How about stopping playing Jesus Christ? How about checking your own failure?'
     "I know very well" Bode called, as if he were on a train passing through a tunnel at high speed, thinking 'I will save you from the gloom, no matter how I do it.'
     "I need a fag now" Bode said curtly. "I'll have to go out and buy a pack."
     "Bode…" Ashley started.
     'Yes, that's my name but don't wear it out' he thought.
     "Bode. No. You are not playing the game. What would you gain from the experiment if you left now? Nothing. It would be too brief."
     "And what do you know? You are not in my head." Bode wiped his wet forehead.
     "And what do you know? You are not in mine" Ashley announced airily.
     "I wish there was a lid on your head so that I could see what's on your mind."
     For the first time Ashley made something out in his voice which was threatening. The sound of his voice touched her. It seemed to rise more immediately from his innermost part than when his face was visible. For the first time she was afraid of him. She believed he was ready for anything. She prodded her handbag further beneath the table lest he should push it across the way and a waiter should stumble over it in their bustling activity.
     "No, you don't." Ashley said in a final tone, thinking 'If only I could be who you wanted all the time…It's the not knowing that freaks you out. Why?'
     Bode yodelled out this irksome monologue. Silence settled in.
     They tore into their Caesar salad and finished it in a moment in utter silence. So did they with their steaks and green beans and garlic bread, and their piece of carrot cake. They devoured their meal steadily. Then Bode left in the dark without a word for tobacco.
     The lady delicately took the blindfold off for Bode. He pursed his eyes for the light had become dazzling to his sight. She directed him to a service station just up the road where he could purchase cigarettes. Bode smiled his thanks and ambled out. The rain had stopped and the fog had come down. It was dense and heavy. At times he could distinguish a hazy sparkling halo filtering through the blanket of fog. His steps were unsteady. He caught a glimpse of the neon sign from the station and saw a dark shape with a red hole on the side of his arm lying next to a gasoline pump. Probably a bum, he thought. He pretended he never saw him and proceeded to buy his pack of weeds. Then he paused in the lavatory at the back of the station for he could not hold out as far as the restaurant and the urinal was a stone's throw away. He flung the door open and entered. It smelt of offal. Then he splashed water over his face at the washbasin and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror, off guard. He caught sight of the fog inside him and blanched. A knot had formed in his chin. Bode closed his eyes for a moment or two. He had a comfortable feeling that he was not inside anything; a feeling that the limitless was at the centre of him. Then he hurried back to the restaurant. Back to the table, he never did light a cigarette. It was a mere pretext.
     He talked to Ashley about Venice and how nice it would be to take a trip there.  While he talked, he let his memory carry him away into a poster of Venice he recollected from a high school classroom which was festooned with them - Paris, London, Edinburgh, Cardiff, Madrid… He took the sun, the unclouded azure sky, the warm air, the gentle breeze, the subdued light with him. He took the weather with him. Ashley said how much she wanted them to have a house of their own with a neat garden, flower beds and an aloe.
     After this, she groped for his hands and entreated him in a desperate voice to feel her face. As he did so, he felt it was somebody else's face he was running his fingers over. In a moment he flew back to Venice.
     Bode never had to propose to Ashley, the hardness of a gold ring in a silky case would speak for him.  Ashley never had to disclose her pregnancy, the soft roundness of her belly would speak for her.
     On their departure from the restaurant, on the threshold, Bode inclined his head to the left and stared at Ashley for a moment. She was swathed in the dull fog. He frowned at the patches of Ashley in front of him and said "Who are you?"

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